Life is changing before me
The unknown staring me in the face
My plans I've accomplished
it's another fork in the road
where do I go?
What should I do?
So many choices!
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Pornography: The Addiction
The computer lay in pieces on the wet grass. CD’s were smashed, videos and DVD’s mutilated at his feet. Tools of destruction? A bat and a pair of scissors. Tears, mixing with beads of sweat, streamed down his face as he took it all in-- thousands of dollars of technology now useless. Everything was dead, everything gone. All that once was his-- his wife, his family—no longer resided at his side. He knew the cause; after all, he did love it more than them. He couldn’t help himself. He couldn’t stop! What was wrong with him? Even now, with the carnage of metal and plastic before him, his heart raced with the desire to stop and yet his mind urged to continue. He was addicted. Pornography had taken control…
To some pornography, or porn for short, is an exhibition of free speech, a form of sex-education or even art. To others, it is vile filth that should be banned. To the Greeks, pornographos meant “writing to the harlots” (Goldstein, 9). And harlots, as most of us know, were prostitutes or women who sold themselves for money. Pornography as a whole does the same thing, still today. It commercializes sex.
Every second more than $3,000 is being spent on pornography; 28,258 people are viewing internet pornography; and 372 people are typing pornographic internet searches. In 2001 there were 18.5 million visitors to adult websites. Only four years later, this number rose to 75 million. Also, The U.S.A. is the top producer of pornography. About 90% of porn on the internet is posted by the United States of America. From 1992 the units produced of pornography more than doubled from 405 million to 957 million in 2006 (“Pornography Statistics,” 1-7). The numbers continue to grow around the world and in our own nation.
To illustrate this further, the pornography industry has a larger amount of revenue than the top technology companies combined: Microsoft, Google, Amazon, EBay, Yahoo!, Apple, Netflix, and EarthLink. It also exceeds the revenues of ABC, CBS, and NBC networks (“Pornography Statistics,” 1-2). These days, pornography is anything, but small and insignificant. This is because, unlike the Greek’s pornographos, pornography of today is more than just prostitution.
What else constitutes as pornography? Webster defines pornography as “the depiction of erotic behavior (as in pictures or writing) intended to cause sexual excitement” (661). And even if it wasn’t intended to cause arousal but it does, that is pornography, too (Reid 46). Talk about a broad definition! The scary thing about pornography is that its definition is so broad. It comes in many shapes and forms: magazines, television programs, movies, and the internet. Especially because of the internet, pornography has been made more accessible to people all over the world-- all races, genders, and ages. It can enter into our minds, without us even being aware of the intrusion.
“Intrusion?” you might question, “Is such an extreme word really necessary? Come one, Brooke, seriously. What’s the big deal? Pornography isn’t that bad.” This may seem like nothing of significance or danger. You might even be thinking to yourselves, “It’s not my business what someone does for pleasure, behind closed doors. Nor is it theirs to know what I do behind mine. Heck, if I can’t get it anywhere else, why not take advantage of other available resources. Just one or two looks can’t hurt…” True, one look probably won’t destroy a person’s entire life, but it is that one look that leads to the next and the one after that until a person can’t stop looking. There is a reason that so much money is involved in making and purchasing porn. It is the same reason that alcohol and tobacco companies do so well. Pornography is like a drug; it is addicting. It is just one inhalation or injection that can take a person down the rough road of addiction. The more a person looks at pornography, the less it satisfies. It takes more and more to give the viewer a desired high. In the words of an addict of both drugs and pornography, “In my eyes cocaine doesn’t hold a candle to this. I have done both… Quitting even the hardest drugs was nothing compared to [trying to quit pornography]” (Oaks, 93). Viewing pornography may seem like a harmless act, like it won’t hurt you or the people around you, but it can.
In a chapter about immorality, Steven A. Cramer, an author of more than a dozen inspirational books, expounds on the affect pornography has on relationships. He explains that, “A person addicted to pornography cannot sustain meaningful relationships because his capacity to love has been destroyed, burned away by the flames of lust, leaving him hollow and empty inside. He is incapable of giving love to others while his thoughts are constantly dominated by a gnawing hunger for an illusionary fulfillment that pornography promises but never delivers” (Cramer, 129). At first, the injury won’t be apparent, but in time the damage will surface and when it does pornography will have done its damage, addiction will have taken over and everything else will fall away.
Again, it might not seem like a bad thing at first, but pornography can have definite negative effects. Families can be torn apart, friendships disintegrated, lives lost due to indulgences in glorified sex. In the words of Ted Bundy, a serial killer/rapist of the 1970’s, people who commit sexual sin and/or crimes don’t start off as “…Some kind of inherent monsters. We are your sons and we are your husbands and we grew up in regular families.” Ted Bundy started looking at pornography as an early teen. His addiction increased little by little until he was attacking young women, raping them, and then beating them to death (Itzin, 140). Pornographic thoughts had poisoned his mind and morphed him into a “monster” that couldn’t resist acting out his distorted thoughts and fantasies on unsuspecting young women.
From Ted Bundy’s example and many others throughout the world, we can see that constantly looking and thinking about anything eventually leads to actions. To borrow a phrase from the Christian motivational book Putting on the Armor of God, “What gets [your] attention gets [you]” (Cramer, 158). This book discusses the importance of monitoring thoughts because thoughts can and do lead to actions. People won’t necessarily become serial killers or rapists just from watching a few pornographic films, but there is a correlation there. People who experiment with pornography are definitely more apt to act out their (sometimes violent) sexual desires. For example, after watching a fast food commercial, if I were to sit and contemplate how delicious a pepperoni pizza tastes, appears, and smells, then I could end up in my car heading to the nearest pizzeria or at least desiring to eat some pizza or anything else for that matter. It is like going to the going to the grocery store when you’re hungry. The thoughts and feelings of hunger can eventually become objects in your cart that you don’t really need. You pull them off the shelves simply because they are there reminding you of your growling stomach. These are oversimplified examples, but they do show how thoughts can turn into actions in our daily lives. With pornography, a person can only watch so much of other people having sex until that person will want to have some of his or her own. But then again, what partner can compete with a flawless, airbrushed masterpiece that pornography presents.
In a letter to a trusted church leader a women poured out her soul. She told a story of heart-break caused from her husband’s addiction to pornography. She felt unable to compete with the sexy images he had grown to lust after. She wrote, “For many years in our marriage… he was most cruel in many of his demands. I was never good enough for him… I know now that I was being compared to the latest 'porn queen'…”(Hinckley, 60). Pornography distorts and numbs the natural senses and desires so that when thoughts finally lead to actions even they won’t be good enough to sustain.
Pornography is a portrayal of beauty, but it is also an illusion. Real women with flaws undergo editing so that the final product is a woman of ideal perfection. Plastic surgeries, make-up, airbrushing and other such photo and film techniques work together in the process of molding raw natural women into unrealistic eye candy--tricking its viewers into believing in it and lusting after such to the point that the women in their lives no longer appeal. True love, a love that withstands outer beauty, withers away. Personality, friendship, tenderness, and selfless-love die and are replaced with bodily hunger for a computer generated image.
Blaming it all on pornography can be a scapegoat when avoiding one’s own personal responsibility. It may be difficult to quit or a person might not want to quit. They may be addicted to pornography, but this is not solely pornography’s fault. As Psychiatrist Patrick Carnes said in his interview with CBS, “Sex is not the enemy. The enemy is us and what we do with our sexuality” (Sex Addiction). Choosing to view pornography is an individual’s choice. Big companies may spend millions of dollars producing it and making it available, but ultimately the choice is ours. And, of course, with choices come consequences.
In my own life, I have witnessed the consequences of Pornography. I know several people whose lives have been affected by a loved one’s addiction. Specifically, three of my aunts’ first husbands were caught within its grasp. Sadly, each relationship ended in divorce. Before the end, though, there was abuse and heartache as well as feelings of inadequacy and confusion for why their spouse was resorting to pornography. Even with years of being separated they still struggle with the painful memories. For instance, one of my aunt’s sons is getting married in July and he wants his real dad to come to the wedding. Due to her pain, though, my aunt is having a hard time with accepting this. Having to see the man who broke her heart in such a way is going to be extremely difficult. Who knows if she will ever find the strength to forgive the past?
My aunts’ relationships ended in divorce, but is this the only way to deal with a spouse’s addiction to pornography? No. Divorce should be the last resort. If a loved one has an addiction to pornography, the best thing to do is to confront them."Confrontation is really your only power," declares Marsha Means an author who wrote a book about her own husband’s addiction. Until that point, she goes on to say, "You're powerless; it's up to God and that person after you confront [them]"(Watters, 2). Talk to the person with love, but be prepared for a variety of responses. He or she could come forward in an honest desire to quit; he or she could deny it; or he or she could blame his or her actions on you. The latter response is usually a way that the addict attempts to justify his or her actions (Watters, 2). If you blow up in anger or treat him or her in disgust, then his or her conscious is eased because he or she can now say that what he or she does is only because you don’t appreciate him or her fully. Whatever the response may be, stay even minded.
Going along with this, Dr. James Dobson in his book Love Must be Tough talks about faltering relationships and gives advice for how to deal with them. He says: “As a love affair begins to deteriorate, the vulnerable partner is inclined to panic. Characteristic responses include grieving, lashing out, begging, pleading, grabbing and holding; or the reaction may be just the opposite, involving appeasement and passivity.” These are not the best ways to deal with the problem. He continues to explain that “such reactions are usually counter-productive, destroying the relationship the threatened person is trying so desperately to preserve"(Watters, 1). Again, stay calm. Try to keep the level of your love for the person above that of the hurt and inevitable anger. Remember that this has nothing to do with you. Like I already stated, he or she made the decision to view pornography. It was a choice. The only thing you can do in a situation like this is assist them in receiving help.
To reiterate, one last time, pornography is an addiction. It is a vicious cycle that begins with only one look. It can affect anyone, at anytime, and in many places. Due to this, we need to be on guard. Defenses need to be made. People, lost and hopeless in the strangles of addiction, need to be rescued. It will be difficult, but it can be done.
If you are in the grasps of addiction, get yourself out before it becomes too late. Think of your loved ones, think of all you hold dear. Is fake love really worth it? If the answer is no, then help is available. Church leaders, addiction counselors, family, and friends are there to give you support. If you are free from the chains of addiction, stay far away from it. Don’t let anything like it near you. If a loved one is struggling with and addiction, do all that you can to help him or her rise above it. In a talk to men across the globe Gordon B. Hinckley, the president of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, warned, “What I have to say is not new. I have spoken on it before…. While the matter of which I speak was a problem then, it is a much more serious problem now. It grows increasingly worse. [Pornography] is like a raging storm, destroying individuals and families, utterly ruining what was once wholesome and beautiful” (1). Stay out of the storm, avoid the pain. Hold on to true love and to all that is meaningful. Unlike pornography, that will warm your heart and provide you with more than momentary pleasure; that will give you real and lasting joy.
… Crushed and unrecognizable lay the sources of his pain. Once glorified beauty, now garbage; “though,” he thought “in all actuality, it had been garbage all along.” He had filled his mind full of trash, tossing real beauty and love aside. His mind suddenly flooded with memories of his life before his addiction. He could see his sweet wife and kids giggling and playing around with the new family dog. It had been many years ago, but, at that moment, it seemed like only yesterday. Oh how he wished to return to those days! Suddenly, hope of a bright future sparked in the distance. A slight glimmer was enough for him! Taking a deep breath, he threw down the bat, staked the scissors in the grass, and started running. It wouldn’t be easy, but it would be worth it. He had taken the first step and was ready to move onto the next. He needed help and that was what he would get. Addiction would no longer rule his life; he would at last be free!
Works Cited
Cramer, Steven. Putting on the Armor of God. United States of America: Cedar Fort, Inc, 1992. Print.
Goldstein, Michael and Harold Sanford Kant with john J. Hartman. Pornography and Sexual Deviance. Los Angeles: University of California Press, 1973. Print.
Hinckley, Gordon. "A Tragic Evil Among Us." Ensign Nov. 2004: 59-62. Print.
Itzin, Catherine. Pornography: Women, Violence and Civil Liberties. New York: Oxford University Press Inc., 1993. Print.
Oaks, Dallin. “Pornography.” Conference Report Apr. 2005: 91–95. Print.
“Pornography Statistics.” FamilySafeMedia.com. Family Safe Media, 2009. Web. 6 May 2009.
Reid, Rory. “The Road Back: Abandoning Pornography.” Liahona Feb. 2005: 28–33. Print.
“The Stories behind Sex Addiction.” CBS News: Sunday Morning. CBS, 16 November 2008. Web. 30 April 2009.
Watters, Steve. “Dealing with Pornography and Internet Addiction.” Focus on the Family.com. Focus on the Family, 2001. Web. 13 May 2009.
Watters, Steve. “Should I Confront My Spouse?” Focus on the Family.com. Focus on the Family, 2001. Web. 13 May 2009.
Webster’s Seventh New Collegiate Dictionary. Springfield, Massachusetts: G & C. Merriam Company, Publishing, 1972. Print.
To some pornography, or porn for short, is an exhibition of free speech, a form of sex-education or even art. To others, it is vile filth that should be banned. To the Greeks, pornographos meant “writing to the harlots” (Goldstein, 9). And harlots, as most of us know, were prostitutes or women who sold themselves for money. Pornography as a whole does the same thing, still today. It commercializes sex.
Every second more than $3,000 is being spent on pornography; 28,258 people are viewing internet pornography; and 372 people are typing pornographic internet searches. In 2001 there were 18.5 million visitors to adult websites. Only four years later, this number rose to 75 million. Also, The U.S.A. is the top producer of pornography. About 90% of porn on the internet is posted by the United States of America. From 1992 the units produced of pornography more than doubled from 405 million to 957 million in 2006 (“Pornography Statistics,” 1-7). The numbers continue to grow around the world and in our own nation.
To illustrate this further, the pornography industry has a larger amount of revenue than the top technology companies combined: Microsoft, Google, Amazon, EBay, Yahoo!, Apple, Netflix, and EarthLink. It also exceeds the revenues of ABC, CBS, and NBC networks (“Pornography Statistics,” 1-2). These days, pornography is anything, but small and insignificant. This is because, unlike the Greek’s pornographos, pornography of today is more than just prostitution.
What else constitutes as pornography? Webster defines pornography as “the depiction of erotic behavior (as in pictures or writing) intended to cause sexual excitement” (661). And even if it wasn’t intended to cause arousal but it does, that is pornography, too (Reid 46). Talk about a broad definition! The scary thing about pornography is that its definition is so broad. It comes in many shapes and forms: magazines, television programs, movies, and the internet. Especially because of the internet, pornography has been made more accessible to people all over the world-- all races, genders, and ages. It can enter into our minds, without us even being aware of the intrusion.
“Intrusion?” you might question, “Is such an extreme word really necessary? Come one, Brooke, seriously. What’s the big deal? Pornography isn’t that bad.” This may seem like nothing of significance or danger. You might even be thinking to yourselves, “It’s not my business what someone does for pleasure, behind closed doors. Nor is it theirs to know what I do behind mine. Heck, if I can’t get it anywhere else, why not take advantage of other available resources. Just one or two looks can’t hurt…” True, one look probably won’t destroy a person’s entire life, but it is that one look that leads to the next and the one after that until a person can’t stop looking. There is a reason that so much money is involved in making and purchasing porn. It is the same reason that alcohol and tobacco companies do so well. Pornography is like a drug; it is addicting. It is just one inhalation or injection that can take a person down the rough road of addiction. The more a person looks at pornography, the less it satisfies. It takes more and more to give the viewer a desired high. In the words of an addict of both drugs and pornography, “In my eyes cocaine doesn’t hold a candle to this. I have done both… Quitting even the hardest drugs was nothing compared to [trying to quit pornography]” (Oaks, 93). Viewing pornography may seem like a harmless act, like it won’t hurt you or the people around you, but it can.
In a chapter about immorality, Steven A. Cramer, an author of more than a dozen inspirational books, expounds on the affect pornography has on relationships. He explains that, “A person addicted to pornography cannot sustain meaningful relationships because his capacity to love has been destroyed, burned away by the flames of lust, leaving him hollow and empty inside. He is incapable of giving love to others while his thoughts are constantly dominated by a gnawing hunger for an illusionary fulfillment that pornography promises but never delivers” (Cramer, 129). At first, the injury won’t be apparent, but in time the damage will surface and when it does pornography will have done its damage, addiction will have taken over and everything else will fall away.
Again, it might not seem like a bad thing at first, but pornography can have definite negative effects. Families can be torn apart, friendships disintegrated, lives lost due to indulgences in glorified sex. In the words of Ted Bundy, a serial killer/rapist of the 1970’s, people who commit sexual sin and/or crimes don’t start off as “…Some kind of inherent monsters. We are your sons and we are your husbands and we grew up in regular families.” Ted Bundy started looking at pornography as an early teen. His addiction increased little by little until he was attacking young women, raping them, and then beating them to death (Itzin, 140). Pornographic thoughts had poisoned his mind and morphed him into a “monster” that couldn’t resist acting out his distorted thoughts and fantasies on unsuspecting young women.
From Ted Bundy’s example and many others throughout the world, we can see that constantly looking and thinking about anything eventually leads to actions. To borrow a phrase from the Christian motivational book Putting on the Armor of God, “What gets [your] attention gets [you]” (Cramer, 158). This book discusses the importance of monitoring thoughts because thoughts can and do lead to actions. People won’t necessarily become serial killers or rapists just from watching a few pornographic films, but there is a correlation there. People who experiment with pornography are definitely more apt to act out their (sometimes violent) sexual desires. For example, after watching a fast food commercial, if I were to sit and contemplate how delicious a pepperoni pizza tastes, appears, and smells, then I could end up in my car heading to the nearest pizzeria or at least desiring to eat some pizza or anything else for that matter. It is like going to the going to the grocery store when you’re hungry. The thoughts and feelings of hunger can eventually become objects in your cart that you don’t really need. You pull them off the shelves simply because they are there reminding you of your growling stomach. These are oversimplified examples, but they do show how thoughts can turn into actions in our daily lives. With pornography, a person can only watch so much of other people having sex until that person will want to have some of his or her own. But then again, what partner can compete with a flawless, airbrushed masterpiece that pornography presents.
In a letter to a trusted church leader a women poured out her soul. She told a story of heart-break caused from her husband’s addiction to pornography. She felt unable to compete with the sexy images he had grown to lust after. She wrote, “For many years in our marriage… he was most cruel in many of his demands. I was never good enough for him… I know now that I was being compared to the latest 'porn queen'…”(Hinckley, 60). Pornography distorts and numbs the natural senses and desires so that when thoughts finally lead to actions even they won’t be good enough to sustain.
Pornography is a portrayal of beauty, but it is also an illusion. Real women with flaws undergo editing so that the final product is a woman of ideal perfection. Plastic surgeries, make-up, airbrushing and other such photo and film techniques work together in the process of molding raw natural women into unrealistic eye candy--tricking its viewers into believing in it and lusting after such to the point that the women in their lives no longer appeal. True love, a love that withstands outer beauty, withers away. Personality, friendship, tenderness, and selfless-love die and are replaced with bodily hunger for a computer generated image.
Blaming it all on pornography can be a scapegoat when avoiding one’s own personal responsibility. It may be difficult to quit or a person might not want to quit. They may be addicted to pornography, but this is not solely pornography’s fault. As Psychiatrist Patrick Carnes said in his interview with CBS, “Sex is not the enemy. The enemy is us and what we do with our sexuality” (Sex Addiction). Choosing to view pornography is an individual’s choice. Big companies may spend millions of dollars producing it and making it available, but ultimately the choice is ours. And, of course, with choices come consequences.
In my own life, I have witnessed the consequences of Pornography. I know several people whose lives have been affected by a loved one’s addiction. Specifically, three of my aunts’ first husbands were caught within its grasp. Sadly, each relationship ended in divorce. Before the end, though, there was abuse and heartache as well as feelings of inadequacy and confusion for why their spouse was resorting to pornography. Even with years of being separated they still struggle with the painful memories. For instance, one of my aunt’s sons is getting married in July and he wants his real dad to come to the wedding. Due to her pain, though, my aunt is having a hard time with accepting this. Having to see the man who broke her heart in such a way is going to be extremely difficult. Who knows if she will ever find the strength to forgive the past?
My aunts’ relationships ended in divorce, but is this the only way to deal with a spouse’s addiction to pornography? No. Divorce should be the last resort. If a loved one has an addiction to pornography, the best thing to do is to confront them."Confrontation is really your only power," declares Marsha Means an author who wrote a book about her own husband’s addiction. Until that point, she goes on to say, "You're powerless; it's up to God and that person after you confront [them]"(Watters, 2). Talk to the person with love, but be prepared for a variety of responses. He or she could come forward in an honest desire to quit; he or she could deny it; or he or she could blame his or her actions on you. The latter response is usually a way that the addict attempts to justify his or her actions (Watters, 2). If you blow up in anger or treat him or her in disgust, then his or her conscious is eased because he or she can now say that what he or she does is only because you don’t appreciate him or her fully. Whatever the response may be, stay even minded.
Going along with this, Dr. James Dobson in his book Love Must be Tough talks about faltering relationships and gives advice for how to deal with them. He says: “As a love affair begins to deteriorate, the vulnerable partner is inclined to panic. Characteristic responses include grieving, lashing out, begging, pleading, grabbing and holding; or the reaction may be just the opposite, involving appeasement and passivity.” These are not the best ways to deal with the problem. He continues to explain that “such reactions are usually counter-productive, destroying the relationship the threatened person is trying so desperately to preserve"(Watters, 1). Again, stay calm. Try to keep the level of your love for the person above that of the hurt and inevitable anger. Remember that this has nothing to do with you. Like I already stated, he or she made the decision to view pornography. It was a choice. The only thing you can do in a situation like this is assist them in receiving help.
To reiterate, one last time, pornography is an addiction. It is a vicious cycle that begins with only one look. It can affect anyone, at anytime, and in many places. Due to this, we need to be on guard. Defenses need to be made. People, lost and hopeless in the strangles of addiction, need to be rescued. It will be difficult, but it can be done.
If you are in the grasps of addiction, get yourself out before it becomes too late. Think of your loved ones, think of all you hold dear. Is fake love really worth it? If the answer is no, then help is available. Church leaders, addiction counselors, family, and friends are there to give you support. If you are free from the chains of addiction, stay far away from it. Don’t let anything like it near you. If a loved one is struggling with and addiction, do all that you can to help him or her rise above it. In a talk to men across the globe Gordon B. Hinckley, the president of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, warned, “What I have to say is not new. I have spoken on it before…. While the matter of which I speak was a problem then, it is a much more serious problem now. It grows increasingly worse. [Pornography] is like a raging storm, destroying individuals and families, utterly ruining what was once wholesome and beautiful” (1). Stay out of the storm, avoid the pain. Hold on to true love and to all that is meaningful. Unlike pornography, that will warm your heart and provide you with more than momentary pleasure; that will give you real and lasting joy.
… Crushed and unrecognizable lay the sources of his pain. Once glorified beauty, now garbage; “though,” he thought “in all actuality, it had been garbage all along.” He had filled his mind full of trash, tossing real beauty and love aside. His mind suddenly flooded with memories of his life before his addiction. He could see his sweet wife and kids giggling and playing around with the new family dog. It had been many years ago, but, at that moment, it seemed like only yesterday. Oh how he wished to return to those days! Suddenly, hope of a bright future sparked in the distance. A slight glimmer was enough for him! Taking a deep breath, he threw down the bat, staked the scissors in the grass, and started running. It wouldn’t be easy, but it would be worth it. He had taken the first step and was ready to move onto the next. He needed help and that was what he would get. Addiction would no longer rule his life; he would at last be free!
Works Cited
Cramer, Steven. Putting on the Armor of God. United States of America: Cedar Fort, Inc, 1992. Print.
Goldstein, Michael and Harold Sanford Kant with john J. Hartman. Pornography and Sexual Deviance. Los Angeles: University of California Press, 1973. Print.
Hinckley, Gordon. "A Tragic Evil Among Us." Ensign Nov. 2004: 59-62. Print.
Itzin, Catherine. Pornography: Women, Violence and Civil Liberties. New York: Oxford University Press Inc., 1993. Print.
Oaks, Dallin. “Pornography.” Conference Report Apr. 2005: 91–95. Print.
“Pornography Statistics.” FamilySafeMedia.com. Family Safe Media, 2009. Web. 6 May 2009.
Reid, Rory. “The Road Back: Abandoning Pornography.” Liahona Feb. 2005: 28–33. Print.
“The Stories behind Sex Addiction.” CBS News: Sunday Morning. CBS, 16 November 2008. Web. 30 April 2009.
Watters, Steve. “Dealing with Pornography and Internet Addiction.” Focus on the Family.com. Focus on the Family, 2001. Web. 13 May 2009.
Watters, Steve. “Should I Confront My Spouse?” Focus on the Family.com. Focus on the Family, 2001. Web. 13 May 2009.
Webster’s Seventh New Collegiate Dictionary. Springfield, Massachusetts: G & C. Merriam Company, Publishing, 1972. Print.
SI: Knowledge Can Make a Difference
I knelt against the door with scissors above my forearm. It was as if a magnet drew the blade to my skin. The pain was satisfying, in a way. I couldn't resist from adding to the wound. As cuts increased, the deeper they became, and yet I hungered for more. I sliced and scraped away at my skin-- blood drawn and arms raw.
Stinging as they rubbed against bed sheets and clothing, my tattered arms provided constant reminder of my actions; I felt embarrassed and confused. What was I doing to myself? I knew my actions equaled those of a mentally insane person, but I felt completely normal. At night, when I found myself impatient to cut again, shame was shoved aside. When the cold metal meshed with my warm flesh, I shivered with excitement. Some sort of high was involved and I was beginning to crave it.
I kept this a secret, wearing long shirts and coming up with excuses for my scars just in case. It was unreasonable. My life wasn't that bad. I had a lot to be grateful for. Why was I doing this? Was I alone in such behavior? I had so many questions and knew none of the answers. All I knew was that I needed help…
As far back as the 1700's there has been record of its presence amongst people (Skin Deep: Understanding Self- Injury). This behavior still exists, but because SI is such an uncomfortable subject, people tend to avoid it. One might even argue that such a topic should be censored from the eyes and ears of impressionable children or people who could mimic such negative behaviors. Yes, this could happen and protecting innocence is important, but what about the rest of the world? People, who already suffer with self-harm, including young children, should not be left to suffer in secret confusion. Knowledge can make a difference.
What exactly is self-injury? I was what one might call a cutter. I used sharp objects to mutilate my arms. This isn’t the only form of self-harm, though. Some people burn themselves and others smack their bodies against unforgiving objects. Internalizing harmful substances, biting, picking at skin, and pulling out hair are also types of self-injury. In the book Treating Self-Injury: A practical Guide, Walsh defines self-injury as the following: "Self-injury is intentional, self-affected, low lethality bodily harm of a socially unacceptable nature, performed to reduce psychological distress" (4). Any action that hurts a person’s own well-being can be considered self-injury or SI, for short.
What kind of person would hurt him/herself on purpose? SI is more common than people think. Self-Injury: A Quick Guide to the Basics describes this well by saying, "Self-injurers come from all walks of life and all economic brackets. People who harm themselves can be male or female; gay, strait, or bi; PhD's, or high school dropouts (or high school students); rich or poor; from any country in the world. Some people who SI function in demanding jobs; they are teachers, therapists, medical professionals, lawyers, professors, engineers. Some are on disability. Their ages range from early teens to early 60's, maybe even older and younger…” (1). As is shown above, people who SI can be anyone, at any age, and in any circumstance.
Why do people intentionally harm themselves? According to a documentary about self-injury, there are several reasons: blocking painful feelings, getting back at an abuser, releasing tension, feeling rejected and/or below expectations, and dealing with family/relationship problems (Skin Deep: Understanding Self-Injury). From analyzing my own personal experience, I can say that the pain and stress on the inside was overwhelming. When I would cut, there wasn’t any intention of killing myself. I only wanted to be in control of my life in the only way I knew how, at the time. Self-injury was a way of coping so that I could continue to live. I felt like I couldn’t do anything to control my emotional life and pain, but I could control my own physical life and pain. When the knife was in my hands, I could escape from reality; I had the power! For whatever the reason and in whatever way, people who SI, like me, are suffering from anguishes so terrible that this is their only way to deal with them.
Due to the intense suffering and shame, Self-Injury is a secretive act. People aren't as willing to get professional help with this as they are for accidental injuries. In the Self-Harm Factsheet 2: For Relatives, Friends, Carers or Teachers it states "…most people keep their self-harm very private. Some say as many as 1 teenager in 10 could be affected. Health professionals probably see only the tip of the iceberg..." (1). Who knows how many people suffer from self-injurious compulsions? Do they understand their own actions? Do they know they’re not alone? Do they know that they can receive help? For many, the answer to all of these questions is no.
A young lady by the name of Emily shared her experience by admitting," I thought no one else was doing it. So, I had never had any place to go" (Skin Deep: Understanding Self-Injury). Many people have no idea that they are not alone in such behavior. They have questions that are desperately in need of answering and yet they know of no person or place that would be willing to assist them.
Now that you know more about it, spread the word. You can help people like me and Emily understand ourselves and heal. If you or someone you know is suffering from an addiction to SI, seek help. Websites like www.Psyke.org, www.recoveryourlife.com, and www.selfharm.net have information, forums, chat rooms, and the like available to everyone. Also, there are free phone-lines open 24/7 to anyone who needs to talk about any problem, big or small. For example, you can call Samaritans at 08457-90-90-90, or Childline at 0-800-1111. It was due to helpful resources like these that I was able to recover from my own addiction. Others can benefit from them, too. Remember, knowledge can make a difference.
Works Cited
The Royal College of Psychiatrists. Self-Harm Factsheet 2: For Relatives, Friends, Carers or Teachers. Harmless, 2008. Print.
Self-Injury: A Quick Guide to the Basics. Palace.net. Deb Martinson, 1998. Web. 9 September 2008.
Skin Deep: Understanding Self-Injury. Charleston, WV : Cambridge Educational/Films for the Humanities & Sciences, 2001. Film.
Walsh, Barent. Treating Self-Injury: A Practical Guide. New York: The Guilford Press, 2008. Print.
Stinging as they rubbed against bed sheets and clothing, my tattered arms provided constant reminder of my actions; I felt embarrassed and confused. What was I doing to myself? I knew my actions equaled those of a mentally insane person, but I felt completely normal. At night, when I found myself impatient to cut again, shame was shoved aside. When the cold metal meshed with my warm flesh, I shivered with excitement. Some sort of high was involved and I was beginning to crave it.
I kept this a secret, wearing long shirts and coming up with excuses for my scars just in case. It was unreasonable. My life wasn't that bad. I had a lot to be grateful for. Why was I doing this? Was I alone in such behavior? I had so many questions and knew none of the answers. All I knew was that I needed help…
As far back as the 1700's there has been record of its presence amongst people (Skin Deep: Understanding Self- Injury). This behavior still exists, but because SI is such an uncomfortable subject, people tend to avoid it. One might even argue that such a topic should be censored from the eyes and ears of impressionable children or people who could mimic such negative behaviors. Yes, this could happen and protecting innocence is important, but what about the rest of the world? People, who already suffer with self-harm, including young children, should not be left to suffer in secret confusion. Knowledge can make a difference.
What exactly is self-injury? I was what one might call a cutter. I used sharp objects to mutilate my arms. This isn’t the only form of self-harm, though. Some people burn themselves and others smack their bodies against unforgiving objects. Internalizing harmful substances, biting, picking at skin, and pulling out hair are also types of self-injury. In the book Treating Self-Injury: A practical Guide, Walsh defines self-injury as the following: "Self-injury is intentional, self-affected, low lethality bodily harm of a socially unacceptable nature, performed to reduce psychological distress" (4). Any action that hurts a person’s own well-being can be considered self-injury or SI, for short.
What kind of person would hurt him/herself on purpose? SI is more common than people think. Self-Injury: A Quick Guide to the Basics describes this well by saying, "Self-injurers come from all walks of life and all economic brackets. People who harm themselves can be male or female; gay, strait, or bi; PhD's, or high school dropouts (or high school students); rich or poor; from any country in the world. Some people who SI function in demanding jobs; they are teachers, therapists, medical professionals, lawyers, professors, engineers. Some are on disability. Their ages range from early teens to early 60's, maybe even older and younger…” (1). As is shown above, people who SI can be anyone, at any age, and in any circumstance.
Why do people intentionally harm themselves? According to a documentary about self-injury, there are several reasons: blocking painful feelings, getting back at an abuser, releasing tension, feeling rejected and/or below expectations, and dealing with family/relationship problems (Skin Deep: Understanding Self-Injury). From analyzing my own personal experience, I can say that the pain and stress on the inside was overwhelming. When I would cut, there wasn’t any intention of killing myself. I only wanted to be in control of my life in the only way I knew how, at the time. Self-injury was a way of coping so that I could continue to live. I felt like I couldn’t do anything to control my emotional life and pain, but I could control my own physical life and pain. When the knife was in my hands, I could escape from reality; I had the power! For whatever the reason and in whatever way, people who SI, like me, are suffering from anguishes so terrible that this is their only way to deal with them.
Due to the intense suffering and shame, Self-Injury is a secretive act. People aren't as willing to get professional help with this as they are for accidental injuries. In the Self-Harm Factsheet 2: For Relatives, Friends, Carers or Teachers it states "…most people keep their self-harm very private. Some say as many as 1 teenager in 10 could be affected. Health professionals probably see only the tip of the iceberg..." (1). Who knows how many people suffer from self-injurious compulsions? Do they understand their own actions? Do they know they’re not alone? Do they know that they can receive help? For many, the answer to all of these questions is no.
A young lady by the name of Emily shared her experience by admitting," I thought no one else was doing it. So, I had never had any place to go" (Skin Deep: Understanding Self-Injury). Many people have no idea that they are not alone in such behavior. They have questions that are desperately in need of answering and yet they know of no person or place that would be willing to assist them.
Now that you know more about it, spread the word. You can help people like me and Emily understand ourselves and heal. If you or someone you know is suffering from an addiction to SI, seek help. Websites like www.Psyke.org, www.recoveryourlife.com, and www.selfharm.net have information, forums, chat rooms, and the like available to everyone. Also, there are free phone-lines open 24/7 to anyone who needs to talk about any problem, big or small. For example, you can call Samaritans at 08457-90-90-90, or Childline at 0-800-1111. It was due to helpful resources like these that I was able to recover from my own addiction. Others can benefit from them, too. Remember, knowledge can make a difference.
Works Cited
The Royal College of Psychiatrists. Self-Harm Factsheet 2: For Relatives, Friends, Carers or Teachers. Harmless, 2008. Print.
Self-Injury: A Quick Guide to the Basics. Palace.net. Deb Martinson, 1998. Web. 9 September 2008.
Skin Deep: Understanding Self-Injury. Charleston, WV : Cambridge Educational/Films for the Humanities & Sciences, 2001. Film.
Walsh, Barent. Treating Self-Injury: A Practical Guide. New York: The Guilford Press, 2008. Print.
Tools for the Trials of Life and the Negative Thoughts that Tag Along
Life, for most people in the world, consists of stress and busy schedules. Everything we do occurs at top notch speeds. The activities we engage in, the shows we watch, the music we listen to, the commodities we buy, the relationships we have/want seem to fly by at rapid tempos. We are easily upset if something seems to be taking "forever" to happen. I know that I have, on more than one occasion, stood in front of the microwave cursing my pre-cooked burrito for taking too long to get warm. Pathetic, probably, but it just shows how much a part of a high-speed society I really am.
With such a society, running as fast it can, responsibilities like family, jobs, and school seem to stack higher and higher. Trying to keep up to par with everything may be difficult and when one falls behind, it seems like there is no way to catch up and the glimmer of hope can quickly morph into a black hole of despair.
Perhaps, you have experienced what I am describing. If you have ever felt like you were drowning in an ocean of stress-overload you probably know what I’m talking about. You are discouraged at yourself for falling behind. You feel mad at the world for throwing so much stress and chaos at you. You feel bad for letting your boss, teachers, and/or loved ones down. You feel horrible about not being "good enough" and then the thoughts begin to make their way in, the negative "just give up" kind of thoughts. "You'll never be able to fix everything or come out on top." "Why are you even trying?" "It is too hard, there’s sooo much to do and not enough time." "There is no hope for a bright future, if you can't handle your life, right now" "You've lost control, stop trying, it is no use."
These thoughts are horrible! They bring with them confusion, doubt, fear, and a disgusting knot in the stomach that forms when a lie is told. This is because these thoughts and thoughts similar to them are lies. Satan, the father lies, wants to destroy us, to make us as miserable as he is. D&C 10: 22 states that: “Satan leads souls to destruction.” And in Moses 4: 6 we learn more about the devil’s evil intentions when we read that: “Satan [seeks] to destroy the world.” He was our brother in the pre-earth life. He knows us: our weaknesses, our talents, our strengths. He knows our great potential and wants us to fail. He, as well as his legions of evil spirit followers, will do all that they can to hinder our progression. Though they cannot read our thoughts, they can whisper evil and degrading things into our minds. If we allow these things to stay, little by little we will fall away from reaching our God-given potential. Steven A. Cramer, in his book, Putting on the Amor of God, states the following phrase repeatedly: “What gets your attention get you.” Negative thoughts (like the aforementioned) have popped into everyone’s head (I know that they’ve popped into mine), but this does not mean we have to keep them there. Even the Savior of the world, He who was perfect, was tempted of the devil. When Jesus had fasted for forty days he went into the wilderness and the devil came to tempt him. In Matt 4: 10 we read the Savior’s response. He commanded: “Get thee hence, Satan…” and like the Savior, we mustn’t allow Satan’s whisperings to stay with us.
We have had and will continue to have challenges in our lives. Satan will continue in his endeavors at feeding negative thoughts into our heads in hope that we will let them linger to torture our souls. Today, though, I want to talk about how we can deal with the stresses of this world and how to replace negative thoughts and feelings with faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and hope in His infinite Atonement.
In his talk entitled Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, Elder Kevin W. Pearson said: “Challenging times require greater spiritual power” (40). How true that is! The bar has been raised in missionary requirements and it should be raised in our own lives. The standards of the world are progressively falling. We see it everywhere (in the streets, at school in the media, and etc). With so much chaos and confusion surrounding us, we need to do more to protect ourselves from falling right alongside the world; we need to do all that we can to stay close to the Lord.
There are many tools like prayer, the words of the prophets, and temple worship available to help us through the hardships of life. Let’s talk a little bit more about each of these tools. First, we can pray. Heavenly Father is there. He listens to and answers every single prayer. He loves us and wants us to come to Him, to give Him our thanks, to share with him our desires, our heartache, to ask Him for help. In D&C 10:5 it says, “Pray always, that you may come off conqueror; yea, that you may conquer Satan, and that you may escape the hands of the servants of Satan that do uphold his work.” Prayer is such a simple thing and yet it is so powerful.
The words of the prophets are another tool. Whether it be President Monson and the general authorities of today or the prophets of old. Messages of comfort and guidance from the Lord are relayed through them to us in church magazines like the Ensign and in the scriptures. This is also a simple thing and so much strength and joy (even answers to prayers) can come from simply reading! I don’t know how many times I have read my scriptures or flipped through talks in the Ensign and had several questions answered or received direction as the Spirit whispered to my heart that what I was reading was truth. Elder Sheldon F. Child in his talk A Sure Foundation pleaded: “Brothers and sisters, if God loves us enough to send us prophets, then we need to love Him enough to follow them. Following the prophets will help protect us against the storms of life and lead us to Christ. [hold scriptures and ensign up] These are words from our Heavenly Father through His servants to me and to you. They can be our guide to surviving and even thriving in these troubled times.
Temple worship is also a source of strength and power in times of need. Elder Richard G. Scott gave a marvelous talk in General Conference last month on this very subject. In his talk he suggested several ways that one can benefit more from attending the temple. Such suggestions include [read out of ensign](44). He also testified that: “When we keep the temple covenants we have made and when we live righteously in order to maintain the blessings promised by those ordinances then come what may, we have no reason to feel despondent”(45). What a blessing it is to have a temple in the very city we live. Travel time is only a matter of minutes and we can be within the walls of the temple, away from the cares of the world. For those of us who are not endowed, we have opportunities several times a week to go do baptisms for the dead. And for the endowed the opportunity is always there. I don’t take enough advantage of this. I get caught up with being too busy or not wanting to sacrifice a few hours of sleep to get up early and go, but I know that when I have gone it has been awesome. The Holy Ghost is strong when I do service in general, but it is especially strong within the sacred walls of the temple, as I participate in ordinances by proxy for those who have gone to the spirit world. If you don’t currently hold a temple recommend, schedule an interview with the bishop to receive one. If you are unworthy to receive one, then get worthy! Again, talk to the bishop, he loves you and is there to help with the repentance process so that you can once again enjoy the blessings of the temple. Attending the temple can strengthen our testimonies and make us more able to deal with the stresses and doubts of the world.
Negativity may crash in from all around us. Circumstance may be treacherous. And with such, doubts and sorrow can crowd our hearts and minds. Even with (ESPECIALLY with) the hard times we are experiencing and/or will experience, we need to remember the many tools that God has provided for us. Prayer, the words of the prophets, and temples are only a few of the resources we have available to us. We have family and friends, home and visiting teachers, institute classes, beautiful and inspiring hymns and music, and other things and people in our lives that can aid us in this earthly experience. Going back to Kevin W. Pearson’s Talk Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, he closed with his testimony that “Because He lives (He being the Savior), there is always hope smiling brightly before us. In a household of faith, there is no need to fear or doubt. Choose to live by faith and not fear.”
I want to close with my own testimony. I know that God lives and loves each one of us. I know that Jesus is my elder brother and my Savior. I know that he lived a perfect life and that if I follow his example I will be blessed. I know that he suffered the Atonement because he loves me and each of us. I know that he experienced all of my pains and all of my heartache. He knows exactly what I have gone through, all that I am going through, and all that I will go through. He died and was resurrected so that we may live again with Him, our Heavenly Parents and all of our loved ones. Life may bring me down, I may be a horrible sinner, but everything will be okay because I know that I am not alone. I know that through repentance, no matter how bad I mess up, I can be made clean; I can be forgiven! I know that Satan is real and that he is doing his best to confuse us, to make us doubt, to lead us away from the blessings that come through living the gospel. Even with the distractions of the devil, even with the stresses of mortality, I know that men are that they might have joy. God wants us to be happy. Times may be hard, but there is no reason to fear. He has provided us with the means to endure. I know that with God we can do and get through anything.
I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
With such a society, running as fast it can, responsibilities like family, jobs, and school seem to stack higher and higher. Trying to keep up to par with everything may be difficult and when one falls behind, it seems like there is no way to catch up and the glimmer of hope can quickly morph into a black hole of despair.
Perhaps, you have experienced what I am describing. If you have ever felt like you were drowning in an ocean of stress-overload you probably know what I’m talking about. You are discouraged at yourself for falling behind. You feel mad at the world for throwing so much stress and chaos at you. You feel bad for letting your boss, teachers, and/or loved ones down. You feel horrible about not being "good enough" and then the thoughts begin to make their way in, the negative "just give up" kind of thoughts. "You'll never be able to fix everything or come out on top." "Why are you even trying?" "It is too hard, there’s sooo much to do and not enough time." "There is no hope for a bright future, if you can't handle your life, right now" "You've lost control, stop trying, it is no use."
These thoughts are horrible! They bring with them confusion, doubt, fear, and a disgusting knot in the stomach that forms when a lie is told. This is because these thoughts and thoughts similar to them are lies. Satan, the father lies, wants to destroy us, to make us as miserable as he is. D&C 10: 22 states that: “Satan leads souls to destruction.” And in Moses 4: 6 we learn more about the devil’s evil intentions when we read that: “Satan [seeks] to destroy the world.” He was our brother in the pre-earth life. He knows us: our weaknesses, our talents, our strengths. He knows our great potential and wants us to fail. He, as well as his legions of evil spirit followers, will do all that they can to hinder our progression. Though they cannot read our thoughts, they can whisper evil and degrading things into our minds. If we allow these things to stay, little by little we will fall away from reaching our God-given potential. Steven A. Cramer, in his book, Putting on the Amor of God, states the following phrase repeatedly: “What gets your attention get you.” Negative thoughts (like the aforementioned) have popped into everyone’s head (I know that they’ve popped into mine), but this does not mean we have to keep them there. Even the Savior of the world, He who was perfect, was tempted of the devil. When Jesus had fasted for forty days he went into the wilderness and the devil came to tempt him. In Matt 4: 10 we read the Savior’s response. He commanded: “Get thee hence, Satan…” and like the Savior, we mustn’t allow Satan’s whisperings to stay with us.
We have had and will continue to have challenges in our lives. Satan will continue in his endeavors at feeding negative thoughts into our heads in hope that we will let them linger to torture our souls. Today, though, I want to talk about how we can deal with the stresses of this world and how to replace negative thoughts and feelings with faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and hope in His infinite Atonement.
In his talk entitled Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, Elder Kevin W. Pearson said: “Challenging times require greater spiritual power” (40). How true that is! The bar has been raised in missionary requirements and it should be raised in our own lives. The standards of the world are progressively falling. We see it everywhere (in the streets, at school in the media, and etc). With so much chaos and confusion surrounding us, we need to do more to protect ourselves from falling right alongside the world; we need to do all that we can to stay close to the Lord.
There are many tools like prayer, the words of the prophets, and temple worship available to help us through the hardships of life. Let’s talk a little bit more about each of these tools. First, we can pray. Heavenly Father is there. He listens to and answers every single prayer. He loves us and wants us to come to Him, to give Him our thanks, to share with him our desires, our heartache, to ask Him for help. In D&C 10:5 it says, “Pray always, that you may come off conqueror; yea, that you may conquer Satan, and that you may escape the hands of the servants of Satan that do uphold his work.” Prayer is such a simple thing and yet it is so powerful.
The words of the prophets are another tool. Whether it be President Monson and the general authorities of today or the prophets of old. Messages of comfort and guidance from the Lord are relayed through them to us in church magazines like the Ensign and in the scriptures. This is also a simple thing and so much strength and joy (even answers to prayers) can come from simply reading! I don’t know how many times I have read my scriptures or flipped through talks in the Ensign and had several questions answered or received direction as the Spirit whispered to my heart that what I was reading was truth. Elder Sheldon F. Child in his talk A Sure Foundation pleaded: “Brothers and sisters, if God loves us enough to send us prophets, then we need to love Him enough to follow them. Following the prophets will help protect us against the storms of life and lead us to Christ. [hold scriptures and ensign up] These are words from our Heavenly Father through His servants to me and to you. They can be our guide to surviving and even thriving in these troubled times.
Temple worship is also a source of strength and power in times of need. Elder Richard G. Scott gave a marvelous talk in General Conference last month on this very subject. In his talk he suggested several ways that one can benefit more from attending the temple. Such suggestions include [read out of ensign](44). He also testified that: “When we keep the temple covenants we have made and when we live righteously in order to maintain the blessings promised by those ordinances then come what may, we have no reason to feel despondent”(45). What a blessing it is to have a temple in the very city we live. Travel time is only a matter of minutes and we can be within the walls of the temple, away from the cares of the world. For those of us who are not endowed, we have opportunities several times a week to go do baptisms for the dead. And for the endowed the opportunity is always there. I don’t take enough advantage of this. I get caught up with being too busy or not wanting to sacrifice a few hours of sleep to get up early and go, but I know that when I have gone it has been awesome. The Holy Ghost is strong when I do service in general, but it is especially strong within the sacred walls of the temple, as I participate in ordinances by proxy for those who have gone to the spirit world. If you don’t currently hold a temple recommend, schedule an interview with the bishop to receive one. If you are unworthy to receive one, then get worthy! Again, talk to the bishop, he loves you and is there to help with the repentance process so that you can once again enjoy the blessings of the temple. Attending the temple can strengthen our testimonies and make us more able to deal with the stresses and doubts of the world.
Negativity may crash in from all around us. Circumstance may be treacherous. And with such, doubts and sorrow can crowd our hearts and minds. Even with (ESPECIALLY with) the hard times we are experiencing and/or will experience, we need to remember the many tools that God has provided for us. Prayer, the words of the prophets, and temples are only a few of the resources we have available to us. We have family and friends, home and visiting teachers, institute classes, beautiful and inspiring hymns and music, and other things and people in our lives that can aid us in this earthly experience. Going back to Kevin W. Pearson’s Talk Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, he closed with his testimony that “Because He lives (He being the Savior), there is always hope smiling brightly before us. In a household of faith, there is no need to fear or doubt. Choose to live by faith and not fear.”
I want to close with my own testimony. I know that God lives and loves each one of us. I know that Jesus is my elder brother and my Savior. I know that he lived a perfect life and that if I follow his example I will be blessed. I know that he suffered the Atonement because he loves me and each of us. I know that he experienced all of my pains and all of my heartache. He knows exactly what I have gone through, all that I am going through, and all that I will go through. He died and was resurrected so that we may live again with Him, our Heavenly Parents and all of our loved ones. Life may bring me down, I may be a horrible sinner, but everything will be okay because I know that I am not alone. I know that through repentance, no matter how bad I mess up, I can be made clean; I can be forgiven! I know that Satan is real and that he is doing his best to confuse us, to make us doubt, to lead us away from the blessings that come through living the gospel. Even with the distractions of the devil, even with the stresses of mortality, I know that men are that they might have joy. God wants us to be happy. Times may be hard, but there is no reason to fear. He has provided us with the means to endure. I know that with God we can do and get through anything.
I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Spring
It is starting to get warm again! In reality, there are spurts of random cold spells sprinkled with snowflakes, but in general spring is "just around the river bend," as Disney's Pocahontas would say (actually, she'd be singing that phrase... haha).
I forget how much I love the sound of birds, every year. Also, the budding leaves and flowers are soo beautiful. The newness of growth (maybe, it's just the surge of energy from my high protein diet) makes me want to burst into song. If my whits would permit, I'd love to just sing happy spring songs while walking to and from class.
I forget how much I love the sound of birds, every year. Also, the budding leaves and flowers are soo beautiful. The newness of growth (maybe, it's just the surge of energy from my high protein diet) makes me want to burst into song. If my whits would permit, I'd love to just sing happy spring songs while walking to and from class.
Saturday @ School
A few years ago I wrote:
This past weekend was a rather weird one. I usually stay at home and catch up on my studies/practicing and then squeeze in some relaxation time. On a spur of the moment thing, though, I ended up hanging out at school all day. Do you know who Adam Neiman is? If not, I highly suggest that you look the fellow up.
So... It turns out that he was giving a studio class and a concert on Saturday. I was pretty much enthused when I found out about this. I attended both and took some great notes. It was very inspirational. He knows his music history, theory and everything in between. I was very impressed and in love with his technique!
I was also able to go to a study group in preparation a test. I think it helped, but I'm not sure. I guess I'll have to wait until the grade is posted. I'd go to all the study groups that are provided, but they seem to be at unsuitable times (for me anyways). I have no form of transportation to get me downtown on the weekends and in the evenings (usually). I am stuck at school from 8 in the morning until 9ish in the p.m., on Tuesdays. Even if a study group is on that day (which never happens), it would probably be during one of my classes. I laugh, because so is life.
And that I concludes my recap of a Saturday @ school. :)
This past weekend was a rather weird one. I usually stay at home and catch up on my studies/practicing and then squeeze in some relaxation time. On a spur of the moment thing, though, I ended up hanging out at school all day. Do you know who Adam Neiman is? If not, I highly suggest that you look the fellow up.
So... It turns out that he was giving a studio class and a concert on Saturday. I was pretty much enthused when I found out about this. I attended both and took some great notes. It was very inspirational. He knows his music history, theory and everything in between. I was very impressed and in love with his technique!
I was also able to go to a study group in preparation a test. I think it helped, but I'm not sure. I guess I'll have to wait until the grade is posted. I'd go to all the study groups that are provided, but they seem to be at unsuitable times (for me anyways). I have no form of transportation to get me downtown on the weekends and in the evenings (usually). I am stuck at school from 8 in the morning until 9ish in the p.m., on Tuesdays. Even if a study group is on that day (which never happens), it would probably be during one of my classes. I laugh, because so is life.
And that I concludes my recap of a Saturday @ school. :)
The ThreeTravelers
Awhile back I wrote:
My 33 year suitor (this is just a nickname for a friend of mine), is goin' to china to teach English. Isn't that awesome? I am quite jealous, and yet happy for the guy. He needs some excitement. Maybe he'll have a fling with some foxy Chinese lady. After all, romance has a sense of excitement... I suppose.
Also, in the realm of travel...My brother, Ryan, is headed to Thailand-- this summer. He went there on his mission, and wants to take "the beautiful Robyn" (his wife) back with him to do all that fun stuff that was prohibited from him, as a missionary. I wish I could hitch a ride with them. I want to travel the world! There are so many beautiful places to see and wonderful things to do. 'Tis a shame that we can't live forever or at least have enough time/money to see and do everything.
My 33 year suitor (this is just a nickname for a friend of mine), is goin' to china to teach English. Isn't that awesome? I am quite jealous, and yet happy for the guy. He needs some excitement. Maybe he'll have a fling with some foxy Chinese lady. After all, romance has a sense of excitement... I suppose.
Also, in the realm of travel...My brother, Ryan, is headed to Thailand-- this summer. He went there on his mission, and wants to take "the beautiful Robyn" (his wife) back with him to do all that fun stuff that was prohibited from him, as a missionary. I wish I could hitch a ride with them. I want to travel the world! There are so many beautiful places to see and wonderful things to do. 'Tis a shame that we can't live forever or at least have enough time/money to see and do everything.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
