My Timmy

There once was a boy named Tim Huntsman. I fell in love with him. We got married and are now living happily forever after. The end. :)

We met before Tim's mission at a young single adult sand volleyball activity and we hung out a few times before he left, but we didn't write each other until he was about to come home. When he was finally home, he was trying to decide whether or not he should go back to BYU or stay and attend BSU. Eventually, he came to a decision. He stayed! I'd like to think I had a lot to do with this, though I suppose it doesn't really matter. What matters is that, even though I was nervous about letting another guy (i'd dated some not-so-good guys) into my life, he was patient enough to allow me time to fall in love with him. Tim got home from his mission at a time when I was recovering from some stupid choices that I'd made. I had some trust issues, but he waited it out (it being all the time it took for our relationship to blossom). I'll always be grateful for that.

After months of spending almost every waking moment together (watching movies, doing homework, going to school, attending institute classes, going to church, eating scrumptious triple-decker pb and j sandwiches, playing and singing music, talking on the phone until the wee hours of the morning, hanging out with friends and family... and the list goes on) we went on a stroll from Riva Ridge Way (the street he lived on) to Reutzel Dr (the street I lived on... yes we were neighbors growing up and didn't even know it). We continued walking down Ruetzel while we held hands and talked. I don't remember what we talked about, but our chit chat isn't the point of this story. The good stuff is coming up, though, I promise. Anyways, we walked and walked and walked and when we reached Rushmore Way. Tim got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. I thought he was joking at first and asked in awe, "Are you serious?" Only seconds later, positive that my boyfriend was wanting to become my fiancé, excitement burst from my heart to my mouth and I literally screamed "YES!!!!"

We kept our engagement a secret for one day. Well actually, I think we each told one person. He told his sister and I told my nephew, Gabe (he couldn't talk at the time so I knew my secret was safe with him).  Other than that, we wanted to have a day of bliss just to ourselves.

The next day, he came to pick me up for a car ride. On the way to somewhere (I was clueless), Tim told me about his experience in the temple. I'm not going to go into details about that, but you can know that it made me bawl tears of joy.  I couldn't stop crying. I felt so loved and wanted. This engagement felt soooo right! Tim was planning on driving to the volleyball court where we first met and officially proposing (ring and all) there, but he felt bad about continuing to drive as I was crying. Instead, he pulled over and whipped out the ring. Again he asked me to marry him. This made me cry even harder. :) Hugs and kisses happened... it was a beautiful moment... and then we went to show and tell to our parents and everyone we could think of. 

The only other day in my life that was better than the two days I've just described would be our wedding day.

We were married in the Boise temple on the 27th of March 2010. Family and friends came to the ceremony and witnessed us being sealed for time and all eternity.  There was not a dry eye in the room. The spirit was so sweet.

I now get to be with my best friend for ever--learning and growing. I'm the luckiest girl EVER!  

  

???

Life is changing before me
The unknown staring me in the face

My plans I've accomplished
it's another fork in the road

where do I go?
What should I do?

So many choices!

Of Good Choices and Great Opportunities

Being in a singles' branch, I am reminded constantly of the importance of dating and getting married. I know that marriage should be the ultimate goal of an individual attending a branch of this type, but-- in my case (at least originally)-- the singles' branch was simply an opportunity to socialize with people who were and are in similar circumstances of life and learning as me.

My choice to associate with singles, like all choices, has been accompanied by consequences. It has been wonderful to be able to make friends and feel like, for the first time in my life, that I fit in! And yet, I also feel like I am growing up too fast. Being in college and surrounded by older single adults has given me experience that would have been shielded from me, had I stayed in high school for the usual amount of time.

I have dated all sorts of men (hey, I've even had a few marriage proposals!) and I've been attending a singles ward, institute, and college for three years now. All of this should be new to me, since I am only an 18-year-old girl, but it is not. I am used to all of it. In fact, I am starting to get tired of it all.

People often ask me, "Brooke, if you could go back in time, would you decided to stay in high school?" My reply is always the same, " No. The choice to go to college has given me some hard consequences, but it has been the best decision of my life. If I had the chance to go back in time, even with the knowledge that I have about how it would all turn out, I would choose college over high school, any day." And I would, too! After all, I prayed about that decision and felt like attending college was what I needed to do. As hard as it may be, at times, I still feel comforted in my choice.

With that said, I return to the idea of growing myself up too fast. I have one more year until I graduate with a BA, when a normal girl my age would be barely starting off at a new school as a Freshman-- the world of college being new, fresh, and exciting. It is insane to think about! I am excited to think of how far ahead I am in the world in comparison to that little freshman girl, though.

I have the advantage of a few years of experience. I'll be able to graduate, before I marry (that is, if I ever marry). I'll be able to get a nice, stable job and start really supporting myself (hopefully, anyhow... haha). I'll also probably be able to go to Graduate school. There is so much I can do with my life! Thousands of doors are wide open for me-- each one filled with a dozen fabulous opportunities. I am one lucky girl! I just hope that I can make the most of it.

I haven't done my best, in the past, but today is a new day and a bright future can be mine, if I give it my all and always rely upon the Lord to make up for the difference.

I know...

[If there are any questions about the below please ask me, check out http://www.mormon.org/, http://www.lds.net/, http://www.lds.org/, or talk with your friendly neighborhood LDS missionaries. :) ]

I am a woman with strong christian beliefs, a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (in other words... I'm Mormon), and I know that by the power of prayer anyone can obtain a knowledge of loving heavenly parents and a brother, the Savior, Jesus Christ. How do I know this? Well, let me tell you my story...

I was born into an LDS (Latter-day Saint) family and raised in the church. I remember going to church every week. Sundays were very special.

I loved getting up early and having my mom and grandma (we lived with my grandparents for the first five years of my life) help me curl my long blonde hair and put on a pretty dress. My Grandma would sometimes make us breakfast and she would turn on reverent music (usually the Mormon Tabernacle Choir) as she cooked and finished getting ready for the day. This would set such a peaceful mood.

Primary was amazing! Being with other little kids, to sing songs and learn about the gospel was a very sweet experience. To this day, primary songs have a tender spot in my heart.

When I turned eight-years-old, I was old enough to make my own decision as to whether or not I wanted to be baptized. Looking back on it, I'm not sure that I fully understood the hugeness of the covenants that I was undertaking, but I knew enough. I knew that I wanted to be good and to choose the right. I knew that Christ was baptized and, since he was the perfect example, I knew that I should be baptized, as well.

At my baptism, I remember that, once I had come back out of the water, I felt clean. It was like I was shining from head to toe. I felt warm and cozy-- as if I had received the best hug ever! The next Sunday, I was confirmed and received the gift of the Holy Ghost. This gift has been a major comfort and guide in my life. I have continued to grow and it has helped me make wise decisions and be comforted when things get tough.

The years went by and, eventually, I turned twelve. At this age girls and boys graduated from primary and moved into Young Men's and Young Women's (otherwise known as Youth Group or Mutual). Activities, leaders, and friends were there to help and support me.

The summer after I turned 13, I found a Book of Mormon with my older brother's testimony in the back of it. He first read the whole thing, cover to cover, at the age of 12. Seeing this, I decided to read the Book of Mormon, too. I'd heard some of its stories in Sunday School classes and Sacrament meeting talks.

At first, that was all it was to me-- stories. I read nonchalantly until I reached the book of Enos. That day, my mom and I were driving around and running errands when my progress with reading became the topic of conversation. I told her how much I'd read and she responded with a question that changed everything.

"So... Do you know it's true, yet?" she asked.

At this, I was hit with a realization. "No," I admitted. I had no idea whether or not it was true. I'd heard it was true from family members and church leaders, but I-- for the first time in my life-- didn't want to blindly rely on their words. I wanted to know for myself! After all, if the Book of Mormon wasn't true, then that meant that Joseph Smith didn't translate it correctly. For all I knew, he could have made up the whole thing! If this was the case, then he must not have been an inspired man of God; and if he wasn't a prophet, then the whole church that was supposedly restored through him would have to not be true, as well. This would mean that everything I had been taught throughout my whole life (concerning religion) would have to be wrong. With this train of thought, I began to doubt and question everything. If none of this was true, then I needed to find out for myself so that I could move on with my life. I didn't want to continue "wasting my time" with an untrue church. That would have been pointless.

Reading the Book of Mormon, from that day on, became a quest for knowledge and truth. I prayed to know, without a doubt, whether or not its writings were true, whether or not all of its doctrines were true, and if the prophets and church leaders were are all called of God. I needed to know! Not knowing was driving me insane.

This process of searching for an answer took time. My life consisted of nothing else but reading, praying and searching for answers. Finally, one day, I came across a scripture in Moroni that promised that through the whisperings of the Holy Ghost, a person could know and understand all things. Moroni states:

Behold, I exort you that when ye shall read these things, if it be wisdom in God that ye should read them that ye would remember how merciful the Lord hath been to the children of men, from the creation of Adam even down until the time that ye shall receive these things, and ponder it in your hearts. And when ye shall receive these things, I would exort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost. And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things. (Moroni 10:3-5)

When I read this, my resolve to discover the truthfulness of the Book of Mormon and everything having to do with the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints was strengthened for a final push. I was in the concluding chapter of the book and my faith was beginning to wane. I needed to know, I yearned to know.

At church, during the sacrament hymn, I tried focusing on the words as the congregation sang about the Savior. The words pounded into my head-- words about a man who had supposedly suffered the Atonement for me and for everyone. My mind turned to my recent readings about the Savior. In the book of 3 Nephi, in The Book of Mormon, he comes to visit the people on the American continent after his resurrection. They were the lost sheep that he spoke of in The New Testament. It all made sense. It had to be true, but I wasn't sure, yet. I wanted to be sure so that if anyone asked me if I knew, I could honestly answer them. I closed my eyes and silently offered up one more prayer. I pled with God to know-- to know so that I couldn't question!

All of the sudden, I was filled with warmth. It was as if a light bulb had gone off in my head and in my heart. The clouds of uncertainty lifted and I just knew. The Book of Mormon is true! Jesus is the Christ! God is my father in Heaven! Joseph Smith was a prophet! Gordon B. Hinckley was the president of the church, then, and he was a true prophet, too! Everything came together in a rush of knowledge. The Holy Ghost spoke to my heart of the truthfulness of all of it and my chest burned with emotion. I was crying because the experience was so overpowering. I felt such joy and gratitude for a Heavenly Father who listened to my many prayers and answered every single one. It was amazing!

I gained my own testimony that day and am glad to say that I do know, now. I carried this knowledge with me through the remainder of my jr. high and high school years. It has gone with me to college and I am constantly reminded of the sweetness and truth of the gospel through my studies, prayers, and attendance in my singles' ward and institute classes. I pray to always remember this knowledge and to have the courage to share it with others so that they might come to know, as well.

I know...

I know that Jesus was born to Mary about 2000 years ago. I know that he lived a perfect life, suffered the Atonement, bled from every pore, was crucified, and was resurrected for me and for every person who ever lived and who ever will live. He knows and loves me. He suffered through all of my pains and has atoned for all of my sins so that I might not be alone through the trials of this life and so that I can repent and be clean again. Oh, how I love the Savior!!!!

I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet. Before that, though, he was a young boy who lived at a time of great religious excitement. He questioned truth and had the faith to ask, in prayer, about which of the churches he should join. In a grove of trees, he knelt in prayer. His prayer was answered! Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father appeared to him and told him to join none of them.
It was through this young boy's faith, that the gospel was restored upon the earth in all of its fullness. Through the authority/keys of the Priesthood, the church of Christ and the ordinances, doctrines, revelations, scriptures, and etc. are once again upon the earth!

I know that the Book of Mormon is true scripture. I have read it and have felt the beautiful promptings of the Holy ghost while doing so. It, alongside the Bible, is another testament of Christ. It is a record of a people who lived on the American continent-- their dealings with God, the Savior, and each other. It was translated by Joseph Smith with the assistance of the Urim and Thummim. Though it be a record of ancient inhabitants, its writings have the ability to change lives for the better, comfort hearts, and inspire those who read it, today.

I know that temples are holy places, houses of the Lord. I know that the ordinances done in temples (for the living and dead) make it possible for families to be together forever.

I know that God loves me, that I am his daughter, and that he wants me to be happy. He listens to my prayers and answers each and everyone of them. Prayer is powerful! Miracles happen everyday because of simple prayers. I know that "with God, nothing is impossible" (Luke 1:37).

I know that anyone can come to this knowledge and find answers to any question through careful study and earnest prayer.

I know these things and so much more.... It is so wonderful!!!!! and I thank my God for all of it!

I testify of these things and close this blog entry in Jesus Christ's sacred name. Amen. :)

You're How Old?

5/5/07

People tend to think that I am older than I really am. I suppose it is probably just assumed, because of my collegiate circumstances. At least, hopefully this is so. I would rather not simply look older, especially in the latter years of my life. Being a 40-year-old with an 80-year-old's appearance does not sound very appealing.

General Eds

3/14/07

General Eds have not been my favorite aspect of college, but it is certainly nice to nibble on a wide selection of fields and topics. I have a feeling that I'm going to miss the variety, when my focus is completely on my chosen degree. I'll have English coming out my eyeballs!

Declaring a major does seem almost too concrete (kind of intimidating (not that a slab of concrete is intimidating... Unless, of course, you are randomly falling to your death)). I am pretty sure I've decided on a good one, for myself, but a shade of doubt makes its way through my thoughts, every once in a while. A person can change his or her major, of course, but I'd rather not take "forever" to get through school because of such indecision. Ya know?

ch-ch-ch-changes

It is intriguing, to me, how people are constantly changing. It never stops! The human mind is constantly thinking, even while we sleep. It takes in information from our surroundings, processes it, and incorporates it into our identities. I look at my own self, for example, and in just one day my opinion about something or another changes. I wrote an email about my future life, awhile back. It was out of fun (of course) but as I was reading through it I realized that, in just a few weeks, some of my dreams and goals have and will probably continue to change. With the meeting of new people and the undergoing of new experiences, a person's perspective is bound to reconstruct. I simply hope that I can keep up with myself!

Below is the email I mentioned:

"Your Name,

To spice up our emails -->

What do you want to do with your life? If you could plan out exactly how your life would be, what would you want to happen, and how would you like to be? I look forward to my life and love to just ponder about what the future holds. It is kind of like reading a mystery book about myself. When I go from day to day and experience new things, it is like turning the pages and little by little figuring things out. I often times catch myself thinking, "So this is what its like" as I hit new stages. I love it (mostly)!

Anyway...

YOUNG ADULT- hood
I want to finish up my major. I am planning on transferring with an associates to BYU (I guess I'll see what the only true school is all about, ya know? haha). If my life turns out how I think it will, I will then meet Mr. Amazing who will be just returned from his mission. We shall date the year before I graduate and get married the summer after. A honeymoon in the tropics would be nice but I don't have any preferences. If my hubbie is still in school I will support him by working as an editor. I'd like to go on to grad school, somehow and at some point in time, too.

MOMMY- hood

Then of course comes my little children. I want a lot of energetic little boys, and at least one little darling girl. Of course, being an only girl, I always wanted a sister so perhaps two little girls would be a better arrangement. Kid names I am not sure about, yet. I kind of think it would be better to wait and see what suits the kid when he or she comes. I don't want to pre-name a girl Beth if she looks more like a Kahli. That would never be ideal. haha.

I want a big house with a wrap around porch, and gables. I always liked the big double doors with cut glass windows that open into a big living room with a grand piano. Then there is always the white picket fence and a rose garden (it would be a place where my little girls and I could dress up in old 1900's English style clothes with big hats and gloves. Horray for pretend tea parties!).

I'm also one for gardens full of vegetables. My dad always plants rows of flowers and sunflowers between the food. MMM home grown food!!!! I have many a good memory of peeling potatoes, and shelling peas with my big brothers.

I want to write my own book or books and have them published. I love to write and have always wanted to be an author. Music would be a big part of my life, too. Perhaps I'll teach it, while my kids are at school or something. I'd like to get some of my compositions published, as well.

I think a calling in the church, that I would like, would be playing for the primary. I love the primary songs and the spirit that comes when little kids sing about the Savior. Plus, I hear that when a ward knows that you play you get sucked into playing for everything. If this is to be the case, then my preference is the above. As for a hometown, I think it would be fun to live somewhere other than Idaho, though I do like Boise very much. A fresh start, complete with new people, would be lovely.

GRANDMA-hood

One day, I'm bound to get old. When that day comes, I plan on having old lady parties with my friends who live near by. Perhaps, a book club or something of the like will give us the opportunity to chit and chat about our old lady lives while nibbling on old lady food. Haha, I can see myself now. I'll be a plump little grandma, with a disgustingly awesome perm, a bright green sweater covered in sparkly flamingos, and a matching pair of spandex pants to tie it all together. Eww. I can't wait! :)

REALLY OLD GRANDMA-hood

Then comes life in a retirement center. I'll just have bring my old lady parties with me and add a few thrilling games of bingo. Grandma B. will probably go insane and die there as a widow, since women generally live longer than men. It is a kind of depressing ending, actually. Then again perhaps Christ will come by then and I'll be twinkled. That would be pretty cool, I'm not gonna lie.

Yup! That pretty much sums up the imaginary life that I plan on living, if things work out. They most likely will change, but hey. It should be interesting.

Catch ya later,
Brookie"

I'll supply information about my changing ideas continually, throughout these blogs. If you have any Q's, feel free to let me know. Comments and emails are always welcome!

"Let not mercy and truth forsake thee..."

Below is a blog that a friend of mine posted on myspace.com. Following it is my response.

Saturday, March 10, 2007
7:47 AM - They say our feet were made for dirt, I disagree
I have a confession to make: I don't know the difference between a democrat or a republican.And honestly, I don't care to find out. I don't understand why our government has decided to eliminate our choices, and narrow it down to 2. I know there's the green party, and there's a few other candidates, but they never get enough votes, nor the financial support.Anyway, my point is that I decided I really don't like generalizations such as that. I know, I tell my friends all the time that someone is "emo" or whatever, but that's not what I'm talking about. Sort of.I don't understand why we should be categorized into shit like that. I don't care that Democrats only think this way, and Republicans think that way. I don't agree with what some democrats say, and what some republicans say, so I'm not going to be thrust into either category.But this isn't just a political view. I also feel the same way about religion. If you do not already know, at the moment, I attend the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, aka, I'm Mormon. However, I don't agree with all of their teachings. For example. about November last year I think, I wrote a blog about how I think that Murder is the worse thing you could possibly do. However, the LDS religion believes that completely denying God (not just saying "Oh, I don't believe in God" but actually protesting against him, is the worse thing you could do. I just don't understand how that could be worse. Also, if you don't already know this, I am completely and utterly against any type of murder. No human has the right to take the life of another human.From now on, I no longer consider myself Mormon. However, I do not denounce that what the church teaches is false. There are parts of their doctrine that I do believe, but I don't agree with all of it.I consider myself a human being, who believes in whatever I feel to be justifiably right.

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To [name]:

Concerning Labeling:

We, as humans, have a tendency to label the nouns (people, places, things, and ideas). This tendency assists our brains with the process of taking in information. With the quick attachment of a name, we can filter information-- wrong or right-- hence, we categorize, stereotype or what have you. Even saying that humans label, categorize, and stereotype is a form of labeling!

From infancy, we learned to communicate with other humans. We practiced vocalization by zealously saying "mommy" or "doggy" when a woman or animal came into view. We learned the names of colors, body parts, objects, and etc. so that we would be able to describe the world around us. These labels are only descriptions. They are not the whole of whatever is being described but they do play as factors, however minuscule.

When trying to tell your friend about someone you just met, you might end up using words having to do with skin color, body shape, skills, accessories, or religion. Depending on where a person is from and what he or she has learned to categorize as the norm, descriptions may vary. For example: if the person you are describing happens to have dark skin and you live in Idaho (where most of the population is considered "white"), you will probably clarify that he or she is different than the norm by being "black." This is not a racist comment or negative labeling. It is just a description of physical appearance.

The neurological process of labeling has played a role in lives of men, from the beginning. The multiple chapters of history are filled with carnage, hatred, jealously, segregation, and social injustices because this process was used in extremes. Negative connotations made their way into society and when combined with the fear of all things foreign, labeling became more than a means of keeping one's brain from exploding (because of too much info). It transformed into a self-esteem booster (for those wanting to be the better people), a way to scapegoat (for those wanting someone to blame), a form of justification (for those wanting to dehumanize others who are simply different than themselves), and the list goes on.

We all label. These are my labels for you, right now (for further emphasis): you are a human being, a white American, an 18-year-old male, a [his last name], a Boise citizen, a friend, and a W.O.W player (to name a few...).


Concerning Beliefs and Religious Doctrine:

"And honestly, I don't care to find out"~ [his last name].

My man, there's your problem. When you don't understand something, you don't take the time to learn about it. Then you "label" it as crap. Did I say label? I think I did. :) So... about the government and religion, research and pray about them. You don't have to stand for a group, but you should stand for principles. There are eternal truths whether you want to believe it or not. Take, for instance, the law of gravity: (thanks to Newton and a bruise's worth of discovery/ experimentation) we know that what goes up must come down. It is a truth.

You mentioned murder and the denying of God. From my understanding, a person who denies God (on the level of sin worse than murder) is a son of perdition. This person has seen God, Jesus Christ, or both. He or she knows, for a fact, that they exist; therefore, there is no longer faith needed and yet there is denial. This is why (in this sense) denying the existence of God is so terrible, a worse sin than murder. In 2 Thess 2:3-4, it says: "... the son of perdition; Who opposeth and exalteth himself above all that is called God, or that is worshiped; so that he as God sitteth in the temple of God, shewing himself that he is God." Saying that you are above God is worse than murder because when a person commits murder, he or she is only attempting to be above another human by taking away that individual's physical existence. Also, a murderer hasn't taken away everything. There is still life, progression, and agency after death. Both sins are bad, but there are levels of evil acts and levels of consequences to go along with them. According to LDS doctrine, murderers still are allowed in the Telestial kingdom, with some level of glory. A son of perdition, though, is cast into outer darkness to endure eternal torment.

Concerning Attachments and Identity:

"Hence, why I do not want to associate myself with anything. I want to be me. Maybe this is just a phase of finding myself, but I don't feel like I need to be included in a religion, a political group, or any of that other bull[@#?*]. All I need is my friends" ~[last name].

Sorry to use you own words against you (again), but...

Saying that you don't want to be associated with anything is like saying you don't want to exist. You can't be [name] with out being attached to the things that have happened in [name]'s life, the things that [name] does, the things that [name] believes in, and the things that [name] loves. Don't be afraid of what people think. Eleanor Roosevelt once said: "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." In essence, you are giving your consent to be labeled as a nobody when you are afraid to be associated with anything or any group that stands for something. If you aren't associated with ideals that can be potentially put down, then you have nothing. I'd rather stand for something and have strong beliefs than be a fence sitter with neutral ideas or ones that change because of the opinions of others.

All you need is your friends, eh? One day your friends will go on missions, move away (to college and such), get married, and (as morbid as it may seem) die. Basically, people and circumstances change. I have seen relationships come and go in my life and in the lives of those around me. I would be careful to tread upon such an unstable foundation. I'm not saying that friends are bad, but you have to be careful. The influence of a friend can be very powerful. There are and always will be both good and bad peer pressures.

You, my dear, need some direction in your life: ideals, values, dreams, goals, and so on.
Such things will make your life experiences so much more complete, happy, and fulfilling.
Figure out who you are, what you believe in, and what you want to be "labeled". It is important! You are hitting/have already hit a very challenging time in your life. Satan and his legions hate that you have so much potential. They don't want you to succeed! They are (and will continue to) pound you with their well developed tactics. They've been around A LONG time and are good at what they do. Don't give in, or go astray. I know you know what is right and what is wrong. So get up and do something about it. Sitting around and waiting for a life/identity to come to you is not the best plan of action. Do you want to leave butt prints in the sand of time? I think not. You can do anything that you put your mind to!!!! You are one of the most academically capable persons of my acquaintance. I'm rootin' for you to figure things out, and will love you through whatever happens, and through all of your choices (whether I agree with them or not).

That is all.